05.14.08
Mad Scribbles Of A Self-confessed Mind
I just endured a Caesarian delivery. My third time and the most painful. I had BTL [which stands for Bilateral Tubal Ligation], to make it simple, I cannot bear another child anymore. I had to endure a blood transfusion because I lost blood during the operation.
So what am I trying to say? It is not easy birthing. Whether it is Normal Spontaneous Vaginal Delivery[NSVD] or Caesarian delivery, all I can say is ‘0_0′. The pain is unimaginable. However, hearing the cry of the neonate is the ultimate joy of a mother.
While I was prepped for operation, my anesthesiologist told me to just relax and pray that everything goes well, however, my thoughts were on the forthcoming baby. ‘It is alright,’ I said. ‘Just let her cry (because that time I already knew she is a ’she’) and breath and even if I lose everything I got, just let her live.’ Well, it is every newborn’s right to see the world and experience its beauty no matter how degraded our world now is. They should not be deprived just because we don’t want them to see and experience pain like we did.
With that delivery, I learned almost everything or should I add ‘I think of.’ Flashback of memories from my own childhood to the moment I heard the cry of my baby went clashing before me. I began to imagine what kind of life it must be for my parents to raise a child as ‘hmmm’ as naughty as me. 
I also began to think how on earth they have endured years of toil just to raise us, their kids. I knew the answer was simple: Not easy.
The pain I felt during that delivery was really an excruciating one but as I think about the life ahead and the future pain I will encounter, I knew then that that pain is just the little finger of the hand.